
Instead of pouring my energy and savings into finding a "product-market fit" for a startup I liked only in theory, I devoted my attention to finding a "life fit" with activities where working hard felt purposeful and joyous. Seven months after leaving my corporate job, I tried a new approach. A gap year, while possible for college students or millennial tech workers, is a luxury for most Americans whose median bank account balance is about $5,300. I still have a backache from how little I worked.Ĭompounding my shame was the guilt of knowing that time off was a privilege most Americans couldn't afford. I tried rewarding myself with a massage for meeting certain deadlines. I tried limiting my time working after reading about a guy who went to the gym for weeks but didn't allow himself to work out, then lost 100 pounds. I subscribed to a web-development platform. I set a rule for watching Netflix only on the treadmill (like Arianna Huffington), believing that before long, I would run my first marathon.ĭesperate, I tried every hack. I would start with two minutes a day on my startup, knowing that soon I'd be coding for hours on end. I craved the heartbreak we're all inspired by: Oprah Winfrey when she got demoted as a news reporter, Sara Blakely, who bombed the LSAT twice before founding Spanx, and Min Jin Lee, the author of "Pachinko" who had two manuscripts rejected before publishing her first book 12 years after quitting her job as a corporate lawyer.īrimming with Instagram wisdom, I believed even the smallest changes could be transformative. The worst part is I even planned for failure. I had enough savings to start a company in two years, I told myself, before going back to work.įive months later, I was in bed watching TV, wearing the same pajamas I had on for the past four days, with a startup business proposal mostly forgotten.

I was ready to become a svelte, stylish entrepreneur who went on fabulous vacations.


"Goodbye, I'm off to pursue my lifelong dream of becoming a startup founder," I wrote in an email last year addressed to everyone I knew at Google, where I worked at the time. I changed my mindset and discovered unexpected joys, which led to my new approach to my career. It was a huge disappointment when I couldn't keep up with the small goals I set for myself. I quit my job at Google to start a company, but five months after leaving, I hadn't done much.
